SEND ME TOMATOES WITH YOUR LETTERS
by Chikoshika101
Summary: So here I am again, doing a letter fic. This time with Romano, because I've forgotten how to do Germany. Let's hope I get this right. Please tell me if you have any issues with how I do his character. But come on and send him your letters anyway! If you asked anyone else, they'd say he doesn't have anything better to do! But well... oh you'll find out eventually. I DON'T OWN THIS.
1. Intro Letter

**AN: Hello again lovelies! I know, I know! Dx Another new story! But my muses for '****Project Cerberus 2.0**** have gone AWOL and won't even say hi to me any more! I have the ideas, but I just can't seem to get into the mood to type!**

**Anyway, I've decided since the hype over letter fics has gone down, it'll be a little easier to get away with having one. You guys still have to send me letters through PM though, so IF they DO catch me, they can't take it down~**

**I would like to say I look forward to your letters, should you send me any, and that I LOVE getting advice, corrected on any imformation,spelling, and/or grammar that I have gotten wrong. Also, please be at the very LEAST civil when reviewing any of my stories. Not only because I don't like flames, but also because to ME, it's only common courtesy. **_**"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me."**_** does not apply to writers at all. It's the exact opposite in my opinion. Flames can hurt a writer's confidence so much, trust me. Please, I don't mind if you absolutely despise my stories, and tell me so in a review, but can you at least do it civilly while using proper grammar? I can't even text without using proper english, including apostrophes and commas. Mini-rant done. This message will be in all my First Chapter Author's Notes from now on. Thank you for reading.**

**-INSERT STANDARD DISCLAIMER HERE-**

* * *

Ciao Bastardos!

This is Romano, and for the assholes who don't know, I'm also South Italy. My fratello and I's boss has decided I need to make 'friends' , so he's making write letters to everyone, the bastard. Does he not know how expensive this is going to be?! My side is poor enough already. Dammit...

Anyway, I guess I don't really have a damn choice, since it's my boss and all. Allright you bastards, send in your damn letters. I even have to accept letters from those damn Germanics! Dio mio, how much more does my boss want from me!?

Damn Potato-bastards,

South Italy

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_

* * *

**_AN: Yes, I decided to do Romano this time. Even though he's my favorite character, I can't get the hang of Germany's personality. So I went with my second favorite, which is the wonderful, the AMAZING, Lovino Vargas~ I assure you, when I first started to figure out who was my favorite, a German-Italian War broke out. They fought back and forth for weeks. Finally, Romano ran out of tomatoes and had to surrender, while Germany still had plenty of potatoes because they last FOREVER._**

**_Anyway, remember to send in your letters through PM. I wish you didn't have to, but you know how it is. Love ya guys, see you soon!~_**


	2. America1 Letter 1

**AN: FIRST LETTER! WOOT~ Thank you Chillykitty101 for being America. Read this chick's stories, they're pretty good. She's also my Romerica Buddy! Hehehe... KEEP SENDING IN LETTERS PEOPLE, BUT REMEMBER THAT YOU CAN ONLY PM ME.**

**-INSERT STANDARD DISCLAIMER HERE-**

* * *

Romano!

Yo! Hey hey! You're writing letters too Romano! :D That's awesome dude! We should totally catch some Mickey D's sometime!

Hahahah! So, how's it goin' over there in Italy?

THE HERO!

America!

* * *

Ciao Burger-bastard,

Si, I'm writing letters too. If you say so bastard. HELL NO bastardo! I have no idea how the HELL you can eat that nasty shit! I mean really!

North Italy is doing fine... perfectly fine...

Cioa motherfucker!~

South Italy

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	3. America1 Letter 2

**AN: Second letter, also from chillykitty101! LOVE YA GIRL~**

Romano dude!

Why not? D: Mickey D's is amazing! I mean, their shakes and fries? HEAVENLY! How can it be shit! French food is shit man.

I MEANT you, not Italy, silly! You! Romano, SOUTH Italy, Lovino Vargas, whatever other names you have(?). By the way, DO you have any other names? Love to know :D

From the amazingly amazing heroic awesome HERO,

America!

* * *

Ciao once again Burger-bastard,

French food is shit, bastardo. You have an actual point there. But have you ever seen the fucking movie **"Supersize Me"**? I have and that's some messed up shit bastard.

Not so hot. My side isn't as wealthy as my fratello's. The mafia's acting up again, dammit. I don't do a lot in the goverment any more, so I have more time to work my ass off doing something else that I'm not going to fucking tell you about.

Ciao Bastardo,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	4. Wisconsin1 Letter 1

**AN: This letter from Wisconsin is brought to you by Darkbeyonddeath666**

* * *

Mr. South Italy,

Hello this is Wisconsin one of Americas daughters, I think we met when my father took me with him to a confence, i was the quiet dark haired girl in the corner. I heard my father wrote you I apologise if he caused you any trouble, he doesn't often think before he acts.

So aside from my fathers antics how have you been? I hope you are well. Has anything intresting happened lately?

Sincerely,

Samantha Lyn Jones

(Wisconsin)

P.S.  
I sent along with the letter some of my home made fudge and ice cream.

* * *

Ciao Wisconsin,

You're one of America's? I never go to those damn meetings, so we probably never did. You probably met my fratello though... Si, your father wrote me... asshole. No, it's okay, two letters in and I'm already used to it.

I'm doing decent, dammit. Not much is going on here... The mafia is acting up again.

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	5. America1 Letter 3

Romano duuuuude!

WELL, Mickey D's is good, but you're not supposed to eat it EVERYDAY! That's what makes people fat! I eat Burger King on Mondays, Subway on Tuesdays, Culver's on Wednesdays, Mickey D's on Thursdays, Red Lobster on Fridays, Red Robin's on Saturdays, and random leftovers on Sundays! Perfectly healthy diet :D

Secrets, secrets are no fun! Secrets secrets hurt everyone! Hahaha, sorry, just had to :D

FROM THE AWE-INSPIRING AMAZINGLY COOL NON-BASTARDO HERO,

America!

STOP CALLING ME THAT BASTARDO,

Si, that is so damn healthy bastard. -.- EAT REAL FUCKING FOOD DAMMIT! Go look up a list of healthy things to eat bastard. Trust me, none of that shit will be there.

What. The. HELL. THAT WAS FUCKING CREEPY BASTARD. I'm not going to tell you. I was seriously thinking about it, but you just threw that idea out the window. Congrats bastardo.

You really are such a bastard,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	6. America1 Letter 4

**AN: Yet another letter from chillykitty101**

Romanoodles,

I know, so glad you agree with me! And why would I look it up? Health sites are unreliable! Most are targeted towarda starving teenage girls to malnourishment, ya know.

Hahaha! What's with all the name calling? D: I know even knows what a bastardo is but I'm guessing it's rude.

FROM THE AMERICAN HERO,

America!

* * *

What the fuck,

I only agree because that opinion is one I made centuries ago! And no they're not dumbass! Have you ever heard of the Primal Diet? Just meat, vegetables, untreated nuts, and fruits. It's really healthy for you bastard. I almost follow it completely, except I can't live without pasta. If you can't pick it out of a tree or off the ground, or kill it, it's not fucking primal.

You don't even know what bastardo means bastard? Then I have a reason to fucking call you a bastard dammit. Bastardo means bastard in italian, dumbass!

FROM THE ONE WHO'S GONNA SMACK YOU UPSIDE THE HEAD,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	7. Wisconsin1 Letter 2

**AN: Yet another letter from ****Darkbeyonddeath666****! Thanks hun!~ ;D**

* * *

Mr. South Italy

Yea I'm one of Americas and some of the fourty nine other may write.  
Yes your probably right my mistake. Your brother is the really cheerful clueless one right ? If he is then yea I met him. Yea most people do adjust to his antics after awhile, I'm glad your not that mad I hear most nations don't really like him.

Well I hope things get better for you. Wow I'm glad I don't have to put up with that any more Capone in the twenties was bad enough.

Wisconsin

* * *

Just call me Romano,

Allright then. My boss is still annoying me about these letters, dammit. Not enough people have sent in letters. So far, it's only been you and your father. I would even accept a letter from one of those potato-bastards, as long as my boss stopped nagging me!

He can be really, really fucking annoying. Then you heard right. A lot of us hate your father. Personally, I don't fucking care what the fuck he does as long as it doesn't affect me, or makes the world go into WWIII, or some shit like that.

I seriously doubt they will. My side's been like this for awhile now.

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	8. America1 Letter 5

**AN: Thanks again to the lovely **_**chillykitty101**_**!~**

* * *

Romanoodles,

Primal Diet? That's sounds kind of silly. Why would I need a diet anyway? Geez, I'm not fat! I don't go to the gym 6 hours a day for nothing!

Well excuuuuse me. Why should I know Italian? I'll never use iiit!

FROM THE HEROICLY HEROIC HERO,

America!

* * *

Hamburger-bastard,

Eating junk all the time, even when you excersise consistently, is still really bad for you bastard. You're not getting the right nutrition asshat. You are going to burn out, and I'm goinging to laugh dammit.

Because you have thousands of MY people living in your damn country?! What if you meet one who doesn't speak english and you need to tell them something important? Huh?! How are you going to talk to them? I know all the languages spoken in my land!

So going to smack you upside the head at the next meeting,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	9. America1 Letter 6

**AN: CHILLYKITTY101, I WUV YOU~ :3**

* * *

Romanoodles,

Welp, if I die, then the world's going to go craaaaazzyyyy! Russia will take over the world, Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, and all those crazy bastards with kill everyone and poor Israel has to deal with it and Iraq with nuke everybody and you'll all die from radiation and the apocolypse with come to the survivors :D

Pfffft. Spanish is close enough, ain't it?

FROM THE HEROIC AMAZINGLY AWESOME AMERICAN HERO,

America!

* * *

Hamburger-bastard,

... You have got to be the stupidest bastard I have ever had the displeasure of meeting...

HELL NO! ITALIAN IS SO WHERE AT ALL CLOSE TO SPANISH, YOU DUMBASS! WHERE THE HELL DO YOU GET THIS SHIT ANYWAY!? DIO MIO MAN!

I'm going to KILL you for even thinking that!,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	10. Wisconsin1 Letter 3

**AN: Thanks again **_**Darkbeyonddeath666**_**!~**

Well ok if you really want me to.

Well hopefuly more people will write soon, so your boss will stop bothering you. Wow you really don't like Germany and his brother, is there a real reason behind that or are they just anoying? Sorry if that question bugs you,

Yea at times I think that if people gave him a chance they would see that he can be mature sometimes , well when he wants to be. He just doesn't take a lot seriously and even we get a bit tired of it. Yea at least you aren't like Russia.

Well there's always a chance, so keep your spirits up. Yikes I'm glad I'm not you it must be chaos.

Wisconsin

I would prefer that,

So far, not so good, dammit. I don't know why I hate those fucking potato-bastards! I just do, they annoy so much! Especially the blonde one, Germany! The other bastard isn't as bad as long as he stays at that stupid bar of his.

The bastard has lucid moments, I can at least agree with that. They're far and few between, but he has them. Your father should take a lot of things more seriously, dammit. I don't fucking blame you. Please... DON'T bring up that creepy bastard...

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	11. America1 Letter 7

**An: Come on, I can't have Romano talking to just two people! SEND ME SOME LETTERS PLEASE!~**

* * *

Romanoodles,

Yay!

Italian is basically a garbled mix of Latin, French, and Spanish.

Go ahead and Try! Hahahaha!

America!

* * *

Hamburger-bastard,

Only you would take that as a compliment...

... I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO GRACE THAT SHITTY CLAIM WITH A RESPONSE ASSHOLE! I MEAN SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE FUCK MAN!?

I have no words for you,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	12. 2p Romano1 Letter 1

**AN: Thank you very much for sending in a letter. Ladies and gents, a big 'round of applause for **_**Stardust98**_**! YAY, NEW PERSON! -claps-**

* * *

Ciao~ :)

You are my counterpart, si? Hi! :D I'm your 2p! counterpart, Flavio~! *giggles* Hm, you seem a bit angry, you should smile more! :D You act like mi fratello! Tell me, do you enjoy the screams of people as you slowly slash a knife across their necks? *smiles* If not, then just forget anything I said. :D

-Flavio/2p!Romano.

Ciao,

* * *

Si, I guess I'm your counterpart... I don't like to fucking smile, it makes my face hurt bastardo... O_O NO! WHAT THE FUCK MAN!? SI, THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I'LL DO! I mean, HOLY SHIT! ;_;

... I have no words,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	13. America1 Letter 8

**AN: Oh **_**Chillykitty101**_**, I love you! :'D I bust out laughing the second I started reading reading that bigass paragraph.**

* * *

Romanoodles,

Haha. Could never be mad at ya anyway :D

How about... Ahem, Italian (or lingua italiana) is a Romance language spoken mainly in Europe: Italy, Switzerland, San Marino, Vatican City, by minorities in Malta, Monaco, Croatia, Slovenia, France, Libya, Eritrea, and Somalia, and by immigrant communities in the Americas and Australia. Many speakers are native bilinguals of both standardised Italian and other regional languages. Italian is descended from Latin. Unlike most other Romance languages, Italian retains Latin's contrast between short and long consonants. As in most Romance languages, stress is distinctive. In particular, among the Romance languages, Italian is the closest to Latin in terms of vocabulary.

And on the contrary to D. C. behind me, I did NOT just copy that from Wikipedia.

FROM THE AMAZINGLY AMAZING HEROIC HERO,

America!

**From _Chillykitty101 _(A/N: I so copied that from Wikipedia.)**

* * *

Hamburger-bastard,

*blushes a littly TINY bit* W-What the hell's that s-supposed to mean, bastardo?!

... Than you copied it out of a book?

I inclined to believe D.C. on this, bastard.

-sigh-,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	14. Maryland1 Letter 1

**AN: I would like to thank **_**SeeUChan 3**_** for writing in as Maryland! Keep 'em coming people!~ ^_^**

* * *

Hey Romano!

I'm Anna or Maryland! My father has said a lot of things about you! (Yeah my dad is America...) Well what is it like to be related to Spain? I heard that he is cool. What is it like to know that your brother likes ?

From

Anna T. Jones / The State of Maryland

* * *

Ciao Maryland,

Would you rather me call you Anna or Maryland bella?~... I hope the bastard's said only good things about me. -.-

I am NOT related to the Tomato-bastard! He just RAISED me, and he didn't even do a good fucking job at it!

I hate that they're friends so damn much! You have no idea!\

Damn Potato-bastard,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	15. Wisconsin1 Letter 4

**AN: Hello once again **_**darkbeyonddeath666**_**!**

* * *

Romano

I don't really know what bothers you and I won't try and figure it out but from what I've seen of him, he doesn't seem so bad just a bit strict, as for Mr. Prussia I don't really know anything about him so I'll have to take your word for it.

Well it's a start at least I wish people would give him even that much credit. Yea he really should be but he doesn't think anything below a huge crisis is worth being bothered over. Yes it really can wear on you at times. Oh that's right most nations are scared of him, personaly I'm more scared of Minnesota.

Wisconsin

* * *

Ciao,

Germany has got to be the strictest Nation... Unforetunately, that means the fucker is also one of the saner ones... I hate Prussia more than I hate his younger brother though. At least HE can be quiet! Prussia... Not so much. -.-

Your father is... a fucking weirdo. No doubt about that. A weirdo who needs to learn to eat better. Even just a little bit more would make the rest of those fuckers happy. I don't care enough to even yell at him about his stupidity half the time, bastard... Si, most of us get creeped out by him. But, I'd rather deal with him then his sister... What's so bad about Minnesota?

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	16. 2p Saubure1 Letter 1

**AN: YAY, ANOTHER NEW PERSON! This lovely letter is from **_**Italy has a Pasta gun**_**!~ Thanks hun!**

* * *

Bonjour Romano,

I'm 2p Saubure!It's very nice to meet you! My 1p... she's France's little sister and she's really mean. I think that you are really nice unlike my 1p self and I hope that we can get along!

From,

2p Saubure

**From **_**Italy has a Pasta gun**_**:**(( Saubure is a small, French-speaking fictional European country, which stretches in a strip from Switzerland, through the alps between France and Italy, to the Mediterranean Sea.))

* * *

Ciao 2p? Saubure,

It's nice to meet you too... I guess. I've met your... 1p. Trust me, the feeling is fucking mutual. I hope we can get along too...?

The fuck...,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	17. America1 Letter 9

**AN: That's Homeland for you, right Kitty? (Don't wanna use the other name without your permission.)...D. ?...ROMERICA IN SO MANY DIFFERENT WAYS 8D... You come up with the weirdest nicknames. xD**

* * *

Romanozzle (nickname change! :D),

Haha, you're blushing! You're blushing! Spain's totally wrong though, your face doesn't look like a tomato! Your face is prettier than a tomato :D

... Fine. I copied it from Wikipedia.

D. C., go Skype Rome or something...

*in background  
D. C.: Skype Rome? Okay! COMPUTER HERE I COME AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA *crash**

... I think D. C. broke something... again. Welp, better go see what he broke...

From the Hero,

America!

* * *

Hamburger-bastard,

... -blushes even more- OH JUST SHUT UP BASTARDO!... Grazie.

Called it bastard.

Is your capital friends with mine or some shit like that?

I've decided to go to the next meeting bastard. I'm going to smack you upside the head. You better dress nice too, because against my better judgement, I'm also going to take you to eat some actual HEALTHY food. You know, before you die and shit.

What the fuck is with the new nickname dumbass,

..._Lovino Vargas_


	18. Saubure2 Letter 1

**AN: Thanks again for yet another letter! COME ON GUYS, SEND IN MORE! I ****WILL**** GO RUSSIA ON YOUR ASSES! SEND IN LETTERS! *HISSES AND SCREAMS LIKE A DEMON*... *blames the letter***

* * *

Bonjour Romano,

What did that farting newt say about me?! She's always exaggerating on how mean and rude I am! I'm not like that at all dammit! I'm mean only to her since she's way to freaking happy and cheerful 24/7! It's so annoying!* find weapons missing* Shit! My idiot 2p self hid all of my precious knives and guns... and all my other sharp objects! * evil grin* Vengeance is mine... * laughs like a lunatic* I'm going to teach my 2p a lesson on not to mess with my lovely weapons...

From,

Saubure

* * *

Ciao Saubure,

... You sound like a complete and utter fucking PSYCHO... LIKE _RUSSIA_ PSYCHO!

... O_O,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	19. America1 Letter 10 CONGRATS KITTY

**AN: I've always liked Rome as a boy actually. I just get that vibe, you know?... OMG, CONGRATS ON 10 LETTERS KITTY! 8D... SEND IN MORE LETTERS PEOPLE!~**

* * *

Romanozzles,

Hehehe :D

I'm pouting now. Are you happy?

Uh... I guess. But, don't tell Rome, but D. C. has a little crush. Shhhhhhh!

Kay! What kind of "dressy"; Your's or mine? :D cause if ya don't specify I'm wearing jeans and a button down with my almighty jacket.

Don't like it? I can make you... Romanoobie, The Romanilator, Romanananana, or maybe Romanoofle! Or should keep Romanoodles? :P or maybe off Lovino! Lovinooga! Hahahahaha!

From the Amazingly Thoughtful Hero,

America!

* * *

Hamburger-bastard,

-rolls eyes- W-What are you doing right now bastardo? Playing a video game or something like that?

I'm never happy. Amused, but not happy dumbass.

Well... that's just fucking convenient for Rome now isn't it bastard? Very fucking convenient indeed...

MINE OF COURSE. AND DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE WEAR THAT FUGLY, OLD ASS JACKET FROM FUCKING WWII!... -takes deep breath. deflates-... Do you like motorcycles?

Just call me L-Lovino bastard.

Bullshit,

_Lovino Vargas_


	20. Saubure1 Letter 2

**AN: Another letter from _Italy has a Pasta gun! _20TH CHAPTER! WOOT!~**

* * *

Bonjour Romano,

Me Russia psycho? Non! I never really meant any of that I was just angry that my 2p hid my weapons like she does every week! And... I hate Russia! Anyways my human friend and citizen Lucy Yagiri is the one who's crazy! She has this creepy obsession with being my best friend forever and tries to kill anyone I meet with her battle ax! So creepy... If she finds out I'm sending you letters she'll come after you with the intent to kill! * sends green bottle with the word Lucy spray on it* Here if Lucy ever barges into your home use this on her and she'll leave you alone.

From,

Saubure

P.S. This is Lucy Yagiri! I have found this letter and now I'm coming to destroy you for calling Arisu chan ( Saubure) a psycho! Prepare to die by my battle ax! * laughs like a psychopath*

* * *

Dio mio,

HOLY SHIT, SHE FOUND ME. *clutches Lucy-spray* O_O

FUCK MY LIFE,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	21. Saubure1 Letter 3

**AN: Goodness, Lovino's going to need therapy after this. xD**

**Romano: DAMN STRAIGHT I AM! HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU TALK ME INTO THIS AGAIN!?**

**Me:... I can't remember.**

* * *

BONJOUR ROMANO,

YOU ARE GOING TO DIE! MY COUNTRY IS NOT A PSYCHOPATH!

*A purple eyed girl with long blonde hair tied into pigtails wearing a pink dress runs at Romano with her battle ax*

From,

Lucy Yagiri

* * *

CIAO MOTHERFUCKER,

I DON'T WANT TO DIE! *runs the hell away*

Meh,

Romano


	22. America1 Letter 11

**AN: WHOOP. He does know it, oh he does. ;D**

* * *

Lovinooga,

No. I'm writing you silly :D Why do you ask?

... IT IS MY NEW LIFE QUEST!

How? :3

Hey! My bomber jacket is beautimous! Don't insult it! It's helped me through a lot okay!? Somehow it's deflected a lot of random ass bullets!

Only if you call me Alfred. Al, Alfie, and Alf are cool too.

I'M SEXY AND YOU KNOW IT,

Alfred!

* * *

Can't you just call me Lovino,

I meant what are you doing when you're NOT writing me dumbass. Because I'm bored as hell and curious? I don't fucking know, just answer the damn question!

Oh dio mio!

Rome seems to have a crush on D.C. as well, bastardo.

You didn't answer my question bastardo.

OH DIO MIO! Hey Alfred, I need to go to your house early okay? I have a fucking PSYCHO that wants to kill me just for doing letters with her friend. I need to come over, like RIGHT FUCKING NOW.

I don't want to die... OH MY GOD SHE'S HERE,

_Lovino Vargas_


	23. Saubure1 Letter 4

**AN: This reply was sponsored by those damn poofers in Amnesia. 8D**

* * *

ROMANO...I FOUND YOU!

* grabs his arms tightly*

ANY LAST WORDS BEFORE YOU DIE!? * places ax on his throat*

From,

Lucy Yagiri

* * *

YEAH, I DO!... *has a shit eating grin all of a sudden*... Gotcha bitch. *poofs away and a peice of paper falls to the ground* _CIAO MOTHERFUCKER!_


	24. Wisconsin1 Letter 5

Romano

Yea I don't think being a nation is good for your sanity. Oh is he the one I hear shouting about how awesome he is.

I guess he can be a bit odd at times but he's not that bad really. His eating isn't that bad, well it could be worse anyway. That's fine yelling won't really help at all, having a clear head and a firm but calm manner is what normaly works. Well best I can explain it is she's a combo of the two who is obsessed with California and enjoys tormenting me.

Wisconsin

* * *

Ciao Wisconsin,

Si, I agree. YES, HE'S FUCKING ANNOYING AS HELL.

He just told me he eats fastfood EVERYDAY. The only reason that bastard isn't fat is because he works out every damn day. I don't yell at him nearly as much as those other assholes do. I swear, sometimes it's like 'Yell at America Day.' Pisses me off, though I don't fucking know why... She sounds fucking weird.

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	25. America1 Letter 12

Not until you address me as Alfred, Al, Alf, or Alfie,

Um.. I'm at the YMCA, fooling around with D. C., playing video games, and (sadly) doing paperwork.

:D

Really? He acts really rude towards D. C. sometimes though! Is he like you?

Oh yeah, I love motocycles :D i own one. I own it and I drive it. Why?

Okay? My place is open! And Matt is visiting, so he can defend the property with his almighty hockey stick. Trust me dude, that thing's deadly... Especially when he's in Raging Hockey Fan mode.. Erg...

HURRY THEN LOVINOOGA,

Alfred!

* * *

Fine... ALFRED,

I am on a plane to your house bastardo... I never have to do paperwork. One of the few joys of being the minor Half-nation. I fucking hate it, but it's true. My damn fratello has to do it ALL.

Wipe that damn shit-eating grin of yours off your face bastard.

... And what the hell is that supposed to mean dumbass?

... I'll be there in about two hours.

I'M HURRYING DAMMIT. I CAN'T MAKE THE PLANE GO ANY FASTER AL,

_Lovino Vargas_


	26. Saubure1 Letter 5

Bonjour Romano,

What?! What are you a freaking ninja now!? * crumples piece of paper with her fist* You do know that I can find you easily with that tracking devise secretly planted into your skin when I grabbed you!* tracking Romano's coordinates* Found you again! * chases after Romano*

From,

Lucy Yagiri

*peice of paper left by Romano*

Ciao psycho!

GOOD LUCK GETTING TO ME WHEN I'M ON A PLANE BITCH.

Salve,

Romano


	27. America1 Letter 13

**AN: OH COUNTRIES WITH MOTORCYCLES ARE FUCKING SEXY! 8D**

* * *

Okay Lovino!,

Man. Oh well :P

Hehe no :D

Well... he's a... uh.. What's Japan say? Ah, a "tsundere".

What was that motorcyle question about?

Yay!

OH WELL JUST HOPE YOU DON'T DIE,

Alfred!

* * *

Ciao Alfred,

Hey. I'm at the airport.

SI.

Oh... Si, Rome acts a lot me. It's kind of fucking creepy actually. We're a lot alike and we tend to say the same shit at the same damn time.

Oh, I was just hoping I wouldn't be the only fucker with a motorcycle. Did you that the Potato-bastard, Germany, has one too? Talk about weird, seeing as it's GERMANY. But si, I have a bike. A Kawasaki Ninja. Nuclear Waste green and that shit. My helmet's personalized, with my human name engraved on the back.

THANK GOD YOU DIDN'T JINX IT BASTARDO,

_Lovino Vargas_


	28. Saubure1 Letter 6

Bonjour Romano,

Well then I guess I'll wait for you in America since I heard you were going there! meet you at the airport rabid baby squirrel! That's your nickname that I will be calling you from now on!

From,

Lucy Yagiri

* * *

Ciao Lucy,

BACK THE FUCK OFF. I HAVE LUCY SPRAY. WHY THE HELL WON'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE!?

YOU are the rabid animal here,

Romano


	29. Saubure1 Letter 7

Bonjour rabid baby squirrel,

You would have to spray it at me if you want me to leave you alone moron! So far you haven't so I'll continue chasing you! * walks over to Romano with her ax in hand with scary look in her eyes* I'll over look that comment you just said about me for now! * attacks Romano*

From,

Lucy Yagiri

* * *

Ciao Psycho,

...*blinks, blink. sprays you with the Lucy Spray*

-Romano


	30. Wisconsin1 Letter 6

Romano

Yea I don't think any of us are sane. Yea he does sound anoying but I won't judge until I meet him.

Sometimes he gets salad at the restaurants so it's not that bad. Yea I know they do. I see him cry about it when he thinks he's alone, he's a lot more sensitive than most people think. Perhaps you care about him a little. Yea she really is but I'm to scared of her to say that , the last time I insulted her I woke up dangling over a pit of piranhas.

Wisconsin

* * *

Wisconsin,

Well, his brother isn't feeling well enough to go to the next meeting so you might just meet the bastard.

Unless it's a McDonald's salad. I heard even those are unhealthy as hell...

I mean, I yell at everyone, so it's not like it makes a difference to him, si?... And I suddenly just got really, REALLY fucking pissed off.

W-WHAT!? I DO NOT FUCKING CARE ABOUT HIM! W-WHAT THE H-HELL ARE YOU SMOKING!? I MEAN, REALLY. -insert ROMANO blush here-

... Not even Russia does that kind of shit.

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	31. Saubure1 Letter 8

Bonjour rabid baby squirrel,

* gets sprayed* Gah! My eyes...! I'm leaving now... You've won this time but next time you won't be so lucky! * leaves*

From,

Lucy Yagiri

* * *

Dear Lucy,

Great, can I go back to writing Saubure now? ._.

CALM LIKE A BAUS,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	32. America1 Letter 14 IMPORTANT AN!

**AN: I AM SO SORRY FOR NOT ANSWERING ANY LETTERS FOR AWHILE! I'VE BEEN REALLY, REALLY, REALLY BUSY WITH SCHOOL AND SHIT. I have to keep up my grades or else my laptop's taken away. Combined with a shitload of chores that I start on within 30 seconds of getting home(aka: enough time to throw my shit into my room and head back to the kitchen) then doing my chinese and geometry homework for two hours, I have a lot to do and again, I'M REALLY SORRY. I'm exhausted afterwards, so I just can't get to doing these letters. Sorry, rat finished.**

* * *

Chow Lovino,

Okay! Want me to come get ya?

NO! ;D

... Woah. Yeah, Dani's always telling me random shot about Rome (Dani calls him Nico?) and- OW! Dani threw a lamp at me...

Cool :D I has a Harley Davidson, of course. It's red, white, and bluuuue! And helmets are for amatuers. Pfffffft~

HEHEHEHE,

Alfred

* * *

It's spelled CIAO bastardo! DON'T JACK UP MY LANGUAGE,

No, I got it Alfred. I'll hail a fucking cab.

SI.

... -applauds Dani and gives him a thumbsup-

I'll have you know I've been riding motorcycles for ten years asshole! Trust me, helmets come in fucking handy when you're in a crash!

FUCK YOU,

_Lovino_


	33. Saubure1 Letter 9

BONJOUR ROMANO,

NICE TO MEET YOU I'M SAUBURE'S MIRROR SELF * hugs Romano too tight that he can't breathe* I WANT TO MEET AMERICA TO SO LET'S GO TOGETHER! * runs ooff so fast while dragging Romano with her*

From,

Mirror Saubure

* * *

Ciao,

... -gasping for breath- LET ME THE FUCK GO! WHY THE HELL DO YOU WANT TO MEET THAT ASSHOLE! HOLY FUCK, LET ME GOOO!

Salve,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	34. Wisconsin1 Letter 7

Romano

Well I won't be going cause I'm not feeling well so Florida will be there.

Yea I guess that's true but there good for a quick bite to eat.

He doesn't take it that personaly from you , he actually thinks you look cute when your flustered, don't ask how I know that. Aw you do care about him I knew it , don't bother denying it I know you do. Really wow she's even more psyco than I thought.

Wisconsin

* * *

Wisconsin,

Ah. What are they like? I need to be warned ahead of time.

Not in my house they're not.

... Does that bastard really think that or are you just fucking with me? Not that I care. Not at fucking all.

STOP MAKING THESE ACCUSATIONS DAMMIT! O/O

Definitely.

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	35. America1 Letter 15

Okay! Ciao Lovino,

Ah~ okay!

NO!

I'm pouting again :(

Pffffft. When would i get in a crash? Geez~

I WOULD L-WAIT WHAT NOTHING NEVERMIND,

Alfred!

* * *

Ciao Alfred,

... What's your address again?

SI.

And I give a shit why?

You never know bastardo.

... EXCUSE ME -blushing-,

_Lovino_


	36. Saubure1 Letter 10 WOOOT!

**AN: Let's all give a round of applause to_ Italy has a Pasta gun_! They just reached their tenth letter! WOOOTT~~**

* * *

I WANT TO MEET AMERICA BECAUSE HE SEEMS FUN TO BE AROUND!

* continues to drag Romano*

THE NORMAL SAUBURE DOESN'T WANT ME TO MEET ANYONE SINCE SHE THINKS I WILL CORRUPT THEIR MINDS WITH THE COLOR PINK! I TEND TO PUT PEOPLE IN PINK FRILLY DRESSES AND TURN THEIR WHOLE HOUSE CUTE WITH PINK ITEMS AND STUFFED ANIMAL DECORATIONS!

* looks at a non responding Romano* ROMANO, WHY AREN'T YOU SAYING ANYTHING! *shakes him repeatedly* SPEAK TO ME! * accidentally uses her magic mechanical pink sparkly heart wand to turn Romano into a talking stuffed cat* OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THAT! PLEASE FORGIVE ME! * cries and squeezes stuffed cat Romano*

From,

Mirror Saubure

* * *

Mirror Saubure,

... OH DIO MIO, SOME ONE HELP ME PLEASE! OH GOD, WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS TORTURE!?

Help me... somebody,

Romano


	37. America1 Letter 16

Ciao Lovino,

Uhhh... 235 Liberty Avenue?

Because you loooooove me?

Eh.

NOTHING,

Alfred

* * *

Ciao Al,

... Only you would live on a street named that bastardo. I'm in the taxi now.

What the hell are we even 'arguing' about anyway?

And your fucking point is?... WAIT, SHIT, MY KEYBOARD WON'T BACKSPACE.

Just... be careful okay bastardo?

NO WHAT DID YOU SAY,

Lovino


	38. America1 Letter 17

**AN: Oh, looks like things are starting to heat up a tad~**

Ciao Lovino,

I know! Super cool, huh? :D

I dunno.

W-Wait... Do you really love me?

I SAID IT WAS NOTHING,

Alfred

* * *

Ciao Alfred,

That's one way to put it bastard.

I think it was about you getting rid of something... I don't fucking know anymore.

...

ARE YOU FUCKING SURE,

Lovino


	39. Saubure1 Letter 11

Sorry Romano... my wand is out of power and it'll have to charge until tomorrow midnight! * looks at stuffed cat Romano* You're so cute as a stuffed cat! * hugs him* Maybe Spain would like to see you like this! * takes picture of Romano as a stuffed cat and sends the photo to Spain*

From,

Mirror Saubure

* * *

OH HELL NO! NO WAY IN THE SEVEN LEVELS OF HELL AM I GOING TO FUCKING STAY LIKE THIS FOR MORE THAN A FUCKING DAY! AND DON'T YOU FUCKING DA-. Fuck. YOU.

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	40. Saubure1 Letter 12

*sends photo to America*

I also sent one to America... and to everyone else... I need to spread your cuteness! *continues to hug Romano* You're so cute!

From,

Mirror Saubure

* * *

... I'm going to fucking kill you in your goddamn sleep.

Ciao,

Romano


	41. Mexico1 Letter 1

**AN: WHOOP, NEW PERSON! HELLOOOO NEW PERSON WHO'S NAME I'M TOO LAZY TO GO TO PMs AND SEE WHAT IT IS. -claps- WE WUV YOU~~ :3**

Romano,

Hola Roma, it's been long since I've talked to you, but here I am sending you a letter. So how's it going with España? From what i heard, not very well.

Itzel (México)

* * *

Ciao Mexico,

FINALLY, someone sends me a fucking tomato with their letter!

It's going horribly with that tomato-bastard. He's mad at me 'because I spend more time talking to America then hanging out with me!~~" Says the bastardo-spaniard.

Salve,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	42. America1 Letter 18 The Answer

**AN: ;D Ooolala~... HOLY SHIT KITTY. YOUR LETTER IS ON CHAPTER: THE MEANING TO LIFE, THE UNIVERSE, AND EVERYTHING. Aka: 42! BE HAPPY.**

* * *

Ciao Lovino,

Hehe.

Uh... OH YEAH! My jacket~!

Lovinooo? I would like an answer~

YUP.

Dani: He's so not sure.

SHUT UP DANI,

Alfred

* * *

Ciao Alfred,

And that damned shit-eating grin of yours.

Well bastardo, you're not getting one until I get to your house. PATIENCE IS A FUCKING VIRTUE.

_"Loose lips sink ships." _Now tell me and sink a fucking ship.

KEEP TALKING DAMMIT,

Lovino


	43. Wisconsin1 Letter 8

Romano

Well she's fairly normal but totally obsessed with water and a little hyper.

Well there're good when you don't want to cook after a long day of working,

Yes he really does I wouldn't joke about something like this, I hear him talking to himself all the time. If you didn't care why would you ask about it.

No I won't. Your reactions are as cute as dad said they are.

Yea she is, oh crap she's at the door I'm going to go hide somewhere.

Wisconsin

* * *

Wisconsin,

Thanks.

I work all day in the motherfucking hot as hell sun, and I'd still rather starve.

... I don't know, because I'm fucking insane like everyone else?

You... are as horrible as America, I fucking swear.

Good luck bella.

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	44. SaubureSpain1 Letter 13

Hola Lovi,

I just received a photo of you as a stuffed kitty. You're so lindo (cute)! I wish I could hug you!Oh I also sent you a stuffed tomato! * sends a stuffed tomato with eyes and a smiling face on it*

From,

Spain

* * *

Ciao bastardo,

I AM NOT CUTE! AND JUST BECAUSE I'M A CAT DOESN'T MEAN I CAN'T EAT REAL TOMATOES, DAMMIT!

Shut the hell up,

Romano


	45. Mexico1 Letter 2

Romano,

Si, I noticed, he comes by my house crying and telling me "Por que? Why doesn't Romano want to spend time with me!", Kind of annoying.

Mexico

* * *

Ciao Mexico,

Sorry Bella~ You'll just have to deal with the fucker until he can get over it. Or send the bastard to one of those South Americans. I don't fucking care, but I'm sick of the Mediterranean. I'm more likely to befriend one of the potato-bastards than hang out with them nowadays.

Salve,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	46. America1 Letter 19

**AN: And Lovino is shocked to silence. xD**

Lovino, right?!

It's DC yo, I stole this letter from my dad! Gotta tell ya what he wa goin' to say, eh?

He was going to say "I would love you to" in repsonse to your oh so kind "FUCK YOU"- *scribbles off the paper*

Ow! Ow! My dad's chasing me and throwing stuff! DX BYE!

OUCH THAT HURT,

Washington DC  
Daniel Christopher Jones

P. S. America: GET BACK HEREEEE

* * *

Si...?,

...

...

...

ewfqhiubwlfbwdl,

..._Lovino_


	47. Wisconsin1 Letter 9

Romano

No problem I'm happy to help.

What? Are you on a diet or something there's nothing wrong with a bit of fat in your diet, it's just my dad that's not good at moderation.

Honestly your one of the more sane ones, well in comparison to the one's I know of.

Well I'm am his kid we're bound to have similarities.

Well I'm at Alaska's house I don't think she will look here.

Wisconsin

* * *

Wisconsin,

No, it's just that MY food already has enough fucking calories and shit like. The only reason my people aren't fat is that the portion sizes are really small.

... I'll take that as a fucking compliment. Grazie.

... *Sigh*...

I'd still watch out if I were you.

Ciao,

Romano

_Lovino Vargas_


	48. Mexico1 Letter 3

Lovino,

Joder, every single day, every single fucking day he comes and crys, couldn't you be a little nicer at least? I've already dropped him with Panama, but he returns back. Appearently Panama is also tired of him... Joder, el idiota llego...

Itzel,

* * *

Ciao Itzel,

... NO. I'm sick of him too.

Salve,

Romano


	49. SaubureSpain1 Letter 14

But you are cute! How can you eat a real tomato when the inside of your body is filled with polyester stuffing? Well I guess I'll send you a real tomato then * sends tomato*

From,

Spain

* * *

HELLLLOOOOOO!

I'M NOT GOING TO BE A STUFFED ANIMAL FOREVER BASTARD! WHAT THE HELL!? SI, I FUCKING THANK YOU FOR THE DAMN TOMATO BASTARDO.

Ciao,

Romano


	50. America1 Letter 20

**AN: Ah, the joys of using 'DOT DOT DOT' over and over again. :'D**

LOVINO!

W-what happened? What did DC tell you?! F-fuck... What did he tell you?!

Alfred

* * *

Alfred,

... DC told me:

_He was going to say "I would love you to" in repsonse to your oh so kind "FUCK YOU"_

... Was he telling the truth bastardo?

Ciao,

Lovino


End file.
